Tuesday, March 07, 2006

A Word or Three on American Diplomacy.

According to CNN.com today:

"WASHINGTON (AP) -- Vice President Dick Cheney said Tuesday that Iran will not be allowed to have a nuclear weapon and warned 'the United States is keeping all options on the table in addressing the irresponsible conduct of the regime.'"

So nice to know that we're considering all our options, that we're going to go through all possible routes of diplomacy before we invade them. Because we are going invade them. As we did with Iraq, after going through every other single, possible, plausible solution. That whole thing where the Iraqi government wanted to talk? Yeah, we knew that was just a cunning ploy, a "diversion," if you will. So we're going to invade Iran, and just like in Iraq the country will fall (er, I mean "be liberated") in a matter of weeks. Just like in Iraq, the people will welcome our troops with open arms and rose petals strewn at their feet, with nary an uzi nor a grenade launcher amongst them. Just like in Iraq, an unjust tyranny will again fall, and a shining bastion of democracy and stability will again rise. And please, don't worry your little head about such inconsequential matters such as "Where the hell are we going to get enough manpower to pull this invasion off?!" or "You know, the last time we pulled this shit it didn't work out that well, maybe we should rethink and revise... perhaps using an actual plan." Because we are the United Fucking States of America, and simply put, we rock. Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker, and all that jazz.

Don't get me wrong. I am not a fan of Iran. Hell, I very recently threw a tantrum when the Peace Corps attempted to place me almost right next to them. I think that country is run by a government with dangerous goals, and the implications of those guys getting their hands on a nuke scare me very, very much. I just think we should perhaps gather some international support before we go around making threats like this, because eventually we will be called on to back up those threats, and frankly now is not a good time, neither practically nor politically. It seems to me that a lot of the rest of the world hates our guts right now, and the last thing that will restore everyone's trust and respect for America is us invading yet another sovereign nation and forcibly imposing our will and ideals on a wholly different (and unwilling) culture.

Perhaps we should reflect on the results of our actions from the past four and a half years, take some time to truly consider all those options we're keeping on the table, and do this right. Let's lead the world by our example, not by force.

Or let's let the CIA do its job and sabotage this whole nuclear program secretly and silently, instead of loudly swaggering around and proclaiming our intentions like a global John Wayne. Whichever America you want to be.

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